Thursday, July 21, 2011

Grand Girls are Gone...Gone I Tell You

Well, the grand girls are gone. They are off to the unknown, uncharted, dark and cold world. Now why would their mother and father do that to them. Don't they know that any world without their grandma Gray "The best Grandma in the whole world", is a
And for all of you who are curious, yes I balled my eyes out, I wailed and there was even some gnashing of teeth. I am so sad.

My husband has informed me (he was only trying to get me to stop wailing) that we can go visit them, and it is not like we will never see them again so he said. He is wrong...wrong...wrong, does he know where we live. I am clear on the other side of the planet. A grandmother needs to be right next door to her grandchildren...or at least an hours drive. She needs to be there in case of emergencies (to protect them from beatings), she is there to defend them from all the wrong in the world, and definitely from their parents...when need be.

She is also there to color with, cook, make play dough, swim in the kiddie pools, and teach them how to get on their parents last nerve. Now the whole learning process is in stalemate, and don't think I haven't forgotten about the other grand children. Rob says, "oh you still have two grand kids here...pish posh, and yes I do believe it is some consolation, but I want all of them...I must have failed somewhere as a parent, either that or my power of manipulation is fading.

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

UGH! A Bug In My Ear

Okay this is gross, so leave the room if you have a tender ear, lol. This morning at 3:00 I felt a tickle on my ear and thought it was my hair so I batted it down to my ear. Then I felt a bug (I tired not to think about what kind of bug) go inside my ear. I got up immediately and started for the bathroom. And yes I was in panick mode. I looked in my ear, I patted it down in the sink (like that was going to do anything) and I prayed...please God...please God. You see I have this phobia ever since I watched a medical show where a woman got a cockroach in her ear, and felt like she was going mad, and the doctors could not see anything. Then it started moving in my ear again, nope this is not fluid this was a bug and it decided if it was going to miserable stuck in my ear it was going to make me miserable and I decided if it was going to make me miserable was going to make my husband miserable. I have rights by marriage, just check the contract.

He of course thought I was just being over dramatic. He looked in my ear with a flashlight (like he was going to see anything) and said nope I don't see anything and went back to bed. I did my best impression of pissed off, putting my hands on my hips for effect and told him it is a bug and I was gong to the emergency room with him or without him. The bug was moving like crazy I guess it didn't like all that yelling. I pulled on some clothes and told myself, "It will be okay Dee, just try and not think about it...yeah right...remember the phobia? Rob got dressed (and not as quickly I am sure as if it would have been him who had a bug stuck in his ear).

After forever, and the bug moving rapidly and hurting my poor ear, like you would never believe, so painful, I focused on God and thought about anything but that stupid bug in my ear. The doctor looked in it and said yep its a bug it's a cockroach and a big one...okay what is wrong with him? I told him, "Look I don't need to know how big it is or what it is, just get it out. He smiled and then he said first give her some adavan...wonder why he said that? Then they put drops in to numb my ear and kill the bug, the bug stopped moving immediately and finally I could relax and stop freaking out. He tried to get it out but it was coming out in pieces. He finally gave up and called the ENT and I went up there (where they obviously have better equipment). It was out right away and the doctor said hey don't I know you? I said yes, you took out the lump in neck. He said oh yeah, how are you doing. I said fine except for the bug, he laughed, and said yep it was a big one...what is wrong with these doctors, why can't they understand, I DON'T WANT TO KNOW WHAT KIND OF BUG OR HOW BIG IT IS?

Needless to say, I have drops for my ear, it is really sore, and inflamed, and I have been the brunt of everyones jokes today, I don't care, and tonight I am wearing ear plugs...and every night from now on. I went back to bed called work and told them I would not be in till later, and went to sleep...with ear pugs.