Deespot

Back to Work

2012-01-03T20:39:00.001-08:00

Well, I went back to work today, I think if I had much more time off, I would want to turn into a happy homemakers again (okay maybe not). It was a little (okay a lot) stressful today lots of things to work on, I created a new task management system and there were things that needed ironing out. Thanks to one of my wonderful bosses (of bosses past), Col Palmieri taught me all I needed to know about SharePoint (okay not everything) but he was the one that encouraged me to get in there and create and take training and learn new things. Great bosses are....well, just great!!

I made a quick but wonderful dinner and now I am off to treadmill at least 2 miles (not fast) but it still is exercising and I have plans to really keep on going. New Year, new goals, and hey a few new dreams to try and accomplish.

2012-01-02T13:52:00.001-08:00

I went walking yesterday, it was so wonderful, it is so beautiful in Hawaii right now I love having all the windows open and having the cool breeze blow through. I walked about three miles, then came home got a shower and got dinner ready. Since the boys are out of school right now they are here to eat dinner with...I love a good family meal...nothing better. Okay now the funny thing after I was done I sat down and kept telling myself I needed to get up and do the treadmill, then I would remember I had already walk (I cracked myself up).

Later, I got on the computer and noticed that Garrett was on, and chatted with him, I love Skpe, but not as much as I love Garrett. We had a good chat and laughed...a lot, with Garrett there is always laughter (some girl is going to be very lucky someday). Garrett sees life and knows how to laugh at it, what a wonderful gift.

Pizza

2012-01-02T13:46:00.000-08:00

I saw Briana's post and it brought back some great memories of the kids and Pizza. When you have six someone always likes something different on their pizza. Rob was always making pizza in the kitchen (what a mess). I remember cooking the dough and then putting on the stones and the chopping assorted items then letting the kids make their own concoctions. The funny thing about it was they all sampled each others and then would go on about whose was the best (sorry kids mine was). We would always make extras and store the rest in the freezer for another day (we were always on a budget). Cooking with the kids was one of favorite times, or just having them in the kitchen and talking about their day. Cherish those moments kids pretty soon they will be all growed up, and you will be thinking back to days gone by like me.

Pics continued

2012-01-02T13:32:00.000-08:00

2012-01-02T13:27:00.000-08:00

2012-01-02T13:15:00.000-08:00

What a beautiful family.

Christmas Pics of the Kids

2012-01-02T13:05:00.001-08:00

Can you tell Taylor was not happy, but he still looks handsome in his little suit.

Worship

2012-01-01T14:28:00.000-08:00

Today was a beautiful day for worship. A beautiful day in Hawaii. My husband's sermon was a good one too. The New Year has had a great kick off. I Skped with my mom and I know she went to church today. I plan to go walking later since it is such an awesome day, will spend some time with God, my book on tape (thanks Garrett) and just taking in the beautiful sky and lush green trees all around me. I am back on track with eating good and exercising my IBS was out of this world the week of Christmas, and I have to say I am already feeling better. I don't want to spend time looking back just reaching forward. Rob and me have had a great week and a half of being off from work. Lots of relaxing, home cooked meals, and Rob worked on the patching of the roof. I have had a lot of time to clean some things that needed cleaning, but mostly I just enjoyed cooking some good meals for my family (and a few extras), with James and Willie there is always a few extras around to feed. One more day of rest then back to work again, before I left it had gotten a little stressful, with my old boss being back and him wanting me to take care of some things for him, and then him telling me he was going to try and get me back across the street with him for a while because he really needed me...here we go again. Hopefully my new boss will take care of it, besides before the end of the year I will have a whole new job, we shall see where it takes me.

Testimony

2011-12-31T12:23:00.000-08:00

I am starting the New Year with my testimony (long version) because one of my goals this year is to save some souls and a walk closer with my Lord this year. God has blessed with with so much and now that my children are grown and able to fend for themselves (of course they will always need their mommy) I am going to step out in faith and do some things that God has been asking me do (he has a Dee-do list too). Top of the list is that all my children are back in church...all of them (that may take some time but I am a patient woman....did I say determined). I don't understand why they don't go, some of them have gone and it has faded to the wayside, they have a wide array of excuses: I am too busy, I work on Sundays, people at church are hypocrites, I haven't been able to find one I like, you forced me to go when I was little so I don't want to go now, we went too much when we were little, I don't fit in at church, I need my beauty rest, you don't have to go to church to have a relationship with God, I have my own church at home, I am going to let my children chose for themselves, and last but not least I hate church!!! Rob and I just watched a 1929 football highlight where California recovered a fumble ran a football for 69 yards (the wrong way) and was tackled by his own team mate...well, kids I am going to keep tackling you because you are going the wrong way (your kids need to be in church). I realize some of you have already made a commitment to find a church and my prayers are with you that you do and that you find one that fits you well.

When my children were little I prayed consistently for all of them, I worried day and night about their salvation, as their mom it was all I thought about, now that I have seen all of them saved, I am turning my attention to my grandchildren and the lost people around me. My children have been so lucky and God has given them so much. I did not grow up in a christian home and it was all I ever wanted. Although my mom (thanks mom) sent me to church on a bus that came around for bible study at a Baptist Church every Sunday, my dad and her never went with me.

I would go to church and watch these strong Christian families with their children (some of them my Sunday school teachers) interact with their children and tell them and me bible stories about Jesus. I dreamed of a day when I would tell my children stories about Jesus and how much he loved them. I remember one time they (Sunday School teachers) came to visit me at my home, my dad answered the door and I was so happy because I thought now they will talk to him and he will go to church with me, but he closed the door in their faces and yelled at me to go to the door. He told me to talk to them outside, I was never so embarrassed, I got saved at age 11 at that church and I was so excited to be baptised, but when I told my parents about it they refused to come and again I was so embarrassed and hurt, the most important day to me in my life and they were not apart of it. Soon after I gave up on church and stopped going, but I still prayed and talked to God everyday. My mom goes now every Sunday, she was saved as a child but because of her horrible childhood gave up on it, but I was praying for her all these years and I believe God helped nudge her a bit.

I knew I needed to be back in church and after I graduated from high school, I went (scared to death mind you) I was all alone and all by myself. I saw a friend from high school there and her boyfriend led me to the Lord this time I completed understood what I was doing (I rededicated my life to Christ) I was baptised again (I wanted to step out and faith and let God know this time it was for good). It was a wonderful time I was on fire for the the Lord there was bible study and women's discipleship, there was door to door witnessing, music, and so much love. Everyone there made me feel like I was apart of a family, and it was there I began my life long love of teaching children.

I met my first husband there and although we had plans to get married (after he joined the Air Force) I got pregnant. He tried to get me to abort the pregnancy (he was embarrassed and didn't want to tell his family). I refused to do it, and told him I raise the baby by myself if I had to, if I could tell my parents he could tell his. I was really embarrassed at church, but you know what my church family never made me feel embarrassed they held me up and made me feel like I could do this, nobody judged me. My mom and dad encouraged me when Chris was away in Tech school while I gave birth to my wonderful Briana, and she became the new fire in my dad's eyes (he was her dad for the first 3 months of her life). My dad did tell me one time that having all the kids in church was a great thing and he did wish that he had done that for me and my brothers.

God has been with me through ever obstacle in my life, my divorce, my miss steps, my sinful rebellions (I have had big and little sins), I have done things I am not proud of, but you know what? All of it has made me who I am, and God has used all it all for his purpose. The great thing is even though I see myself as spotted and flawed child of his, He sees me clean and pure, I have been washed clean by the blood of Jesus. Some times I pick up those spots and wear them and hold on to them and let cloud my life. Then God reminds me what I look like in his eyes (white as snow), and I cry and start all over.

Thanks to all of you for loving me, and Happy New Year, how wonderful that we have a whole new year to try again...to do better....to go to church....to have a closer walk with Jesus. I love you all so much. I know some of this might embarrass some of you, but it is my life so get over it, I will never give up...never!!!

Great Thanksgiving

2011-11-24T23:16:00.000-08:00

Our Thanksgiving was great, good food, great company...and we got to talk to everyone who wasn't there, we even got to skype. I love technology getting to see all the grandkids, and even getting to skype with Margaret and Bill and Penney, Huxley and Bethany and I won't leave out Bethany's boyfriend, how great is that to get to meet someone over the computer...so cool. Heres some pictures.

Thanksgiving

2011-11-23T20:37:00.000-08:00

I was just sitting here thinking about what I would like to write about for Thanksgiving. As I was contemplating it, I realized this...even though we are separated this year and I would love nothing better than to be with each and everyone of you. I am still the luckiest person alive. Even though we are not spending Thanksgiving "all" together we are still apart of each others lives where ever we are...forever bond in love.

The funny thing as I was sitting here thinking about how alone a feel because I won't be seeing "all" the people I love. It hit me, how really blessed our family is, we are never alone, and especially this year. I mean just think about it guys. Christopher, Stephanie, Willie and James are spending it with us. Garrett is spending it with my mom. Christina and Briana will be together this year. Margaret and Bill get to spend it with Penney and Huxely, James and Theresa. How blessed we really are, so even though we won't "all" be together this year we are, because spending time together even just one of us binds us all as one, how special is that "we are never alone". I love all of you.

He's the Man...Superman

2011-11-09T20:06:00.000-08:00

My son Garrett is the proud owner of a house. He done growed up and I is proud of him...yepper yea buddy...my little bud is now a man. It took a while and saving and scrimping but he did it. I know that a lot of it was him not wanting to leave his grandma alone with uncle Rick too, but it was time. He needs to feel all the pressure of living on his own, and he needs to quit spending all that time on the road. He really was too far away from work and now is much closer.

He hasn't moved out just yet, he needs to fix up some things first, like his kitchen and bathroom, but soon and very soon. Congratulations Garrett I love much, you are my sunshine.

Mothers and Daughters

2011-11-07T11:43:00.000-08:00

These days I long to go back, back to the days when the daughters were little. When Briana would follow me to my bathroom and sit there while I put on my makeup and fixed my hair and watch me intently making me laugh with her silly questions. When Christina was little and she used to dress up in my clothes and high heeled shoes, or the times during church when they would take turns to sit by me and we would snuggle doodling pictures to each other.

It just seems like yesterday I was making doing their hair, making them Easter outfits, Halloween costumes, baking desserts, making playdough and a hundred other things I loved to do with them. Time is so fleeting, and I wish I had more time with them, and I wonder if that is how my mom felt all these years with me never living close to her. My heart breaks everyday not being able to hug them, or kiss their lovely pink cheeks.

My girls...where did all the time go, and when will we meet again. All the plans I envisioned for you...some of those plans have come true and some have changed along the way, mostly because you are their own independent strong women (and I can live with that). I wonder how many plans of my mothers that I foiled along the way. I hope not too many. I do know this that my mom has always supported me in everything, even through some of my craziest times. Remember girls, you too will have plans for your daughters and some you will get to see come to light, but mostly you will see it change according to their own special uniqueness and it will all turn out okay in the end because are truly great mothers.

I she my daughters with their own daughters and I am so proud of them. They are such attentive and loving mothers, how did they turn out so great with such mess of mom like me. Well, I did have a great teacher...they call her Mary Sue, and I treasure all the moments we have been able to spend together and it is why I have made lasting memories with my daughters, and how I treasure them in my mind. Sometimes all the memories help to ground me in this crazy world we live in.

I have some advice for my girls always remember to say:

I love you
I am sorry

You can never go wrong with those two, just remember to always mean them when you say them, and say them as often as you can, it work wonders. I guess I am just sad becasue I won't be seeing the girls in my life this holiday season and my heart is yearning to touch all of them, or kiss their beautiful cheeks, but know this we will meet again and when we do we will laugh and store many more cherished memories of mothers and daughters. I love you.

An Old Dog Can Learn New Tricks

2011-10-25T22:06:00.000-07:00

Oh by the way I am official all better!! At my older job (now that is funny) get it...not my old job (because I just changed jobs), but at my old...old job...I crack myself up. Anyways I was the Share Point Administrator at my old, old job and I learned on my own how to do all the web pages for all the branches (I was so proud of myself). At this new job I have already been given...UGH...duties, you know the ones I am talking about, the ones you hate, and the ones they can't get anybody to do right so when the next new person comes along they decided...let's see if Mickie can do it? Okay, maybe not exactly like that, but pretty much. So they gave me the most boring job in the whole wide world to do and it is not a good thing for the ADHD kid to have, but I am muddling through...but you know me.

I did the UGH job (a work in progress) and all the while revamped there web page (still a work in progress) and I have earned huge brownie points. I even got told today, "How did we survive without?" Do they know that it was not my idea to "Merge" and if I had my way I would be back where I used to be? Guess not, oh well, love working on web pages and I created their Thanksgiving Sign-up page with pictures and everything.

Of course now they want me to do all their division pages (which is okay). No, I still have to do the UGH job, but at least I have some relief here and there.

Sick...Sick...Oh poor, poor Me

2011-10-22T13:59:00.000-07:00

This is day 4 of being soooo sick!!! Is there any help? I could use a magic pill....UGH!!!

The Great Family Historian

2011-10-22T13:50:00.001-07:00

My mother is such a great historian. I love to talk to her about her family. We are lucky because we have had ancestors who kept books and kept their ancestry for us this generation to see. Not only that, but I love my mothers stories. I wish she would write a book, it would be so awsome. She would have made a great Historian...what do I mean...she is a great Historian. I love that fact that she keeps all those memories of her family going, not only that but recently she was able to go on the computer and go all the way back on her dad's side. How amazing is that, here is a woman who doesn't know that much about computers but has pushed herself to learn on her own how to get information. She never knew anything about her dad's side but now she does, and now I do to.

She is such an intelligent woman. I am so lucky to have a mom that has given me the gift of family, facts and all the history behind ours. My mom is the Greatest Historian I know...till James graduates (maybe he got that from her).

Rob is so Great

2011-10-21T21:28:00.001-07:00

I have such a great husband. Sunday, on our way to church I spilled coffee (splattered) all over my white pants (yep I said white). He said just use one of your tide pens, and I said thats okay, I used up my last one. Even though I told him it didn't bother me, I played with the spots and dabbed at my pants. He pulled into a supermarket a little while after and I asked him what he was doing, you see I thought he was going to get donuts or something for church. When he came back out to the car, he handed me a tide pen...that is true love. My husband loves me!

Monsters-In-Law

2011-10-21T21:17:00.000-07:00

Okay, have you heard of this new show they are going to have on (reality) it is all about monsters-in-law. In the previews all you see is hate, yelling and screaming. Every time we see the trailers for the show, me and Rob look at each other and say how lucky we are we have the in-laws we have. Rob said it is so great that my mom has always been so supportive and wonderfully nice to him. I said I was so lucky that Bill and Margaret love me and make me feel their love every time they talk to me. WE ARE SO LUCKY!! God Blessed us with great in-laws.

SICK

2011-10-21T21:10:00.000-07:00

I am sick...so sick, not just a little sick, I have the flu....stomach for 3 days now, and if it lasts one more day I most certainly will be dead.

Happy Birthday to Me

2011-10-09T20:00:00.001-07:00

Yesterday was my birthday...49 years old. A big thank you to my Mom and Margaret and Bill for the birthday dollars, I already spent it on my nice running shoes (wide), sometimes I have to pay extra because of my big fat foot, and of course I got pink (my favorite color). Christina got me flowers (they were beautiful). I got a phone call from everyone...except Chris, but he usually forgets. My brother even called, that made my day. Rob and the boys took me out to eat, that was really nice.

It seems on my birthday I revert back to a child, my mom always made birthday's a big deal, and I got to be queen for the day, we didn't have big elaborate parties, just the family, but mom would go to this great bakery shop and would order me my favorite cake. Chocolate!!! It was chocolate cake, with chocolate icing and chocolate bars all around it, I don't think anybody liked it it but me, but maybe that was my plan to get the whole cake all to myself. I always felt very special. For some reason when you get older it is just not the same...next year I think I am going home so my mommy can spoil me.

Worry, worry, worry and more worry

2011-10-06T16:26:00.000-07:00

I know I have not been keeping up with the blog thing, but hey I have been busy:

New Job
House tenting
Worrying about my kids
Worrying about my grandkids
Worrying about my husband
Worrying about my mom
Worrying about my in-laws
Worrying about money, money and yes we always come back to the money thing

I really don't get it either. God always gives me just enough...what I need, and a lot of times, a little bit more than I need. Everyday I place all my burdens at his feet (and it is a big pile), and by the time evening comes it seems I have piled it back where it was to begin with. How does this happen? I think God (everyday) is smiling down at me and shaking his head. He probably tells the angels,"That there, Dee, she just keeps complicating things, oh she listens to me and hand things over to me, but just when I start taking care of it for her, she snatches it all right back, like clock work mind you, she is a funny creation that one". Yep, I know that is what he is saying and he is still patient with me, every minute, every hour, he waits...for me. I love my God.

A New Breathing Machine

2011-08-23T23:48:00.000-07:00

The nurse came to show me how to use my new breathing machine, which is really awesome. Do you know that it has it's own scan disk that they can take out and see how I am doing. The new tubing and masks are really getting better and better.

Now enough about that, she said apparently I got worse...really worse. She said they don't have people get that bad after such a short time. I once again am a rare oddity, I should feel bad but I don't, I am very special. So special that I have a machine that breathes in and out for me...WOW!!

Now here is the bad part, even though I have this super duper machine, IT DOES NOT WORK. I was up more than with my other machine the last two nights and last night was the worst of all. I don't know what I am going to do. She did say I might need some adjustments, but I think I will just stick with the fact that I am special and not meant to get sleep at night.

My mom doesn't, so maybe I just have her genes.

Sleep Study

2011-08-20T14:04:00.000-07:00

A couple of weeks ago, I did a sleep study...my second one. Why because lately once again, I am waking up tired, and I am falling asleep on the way home again, and the clincher is that I am dreaming right away. That usually means your sleep pattern is messed up because you are suppose to dream during your rim sleep. So what did I do I put it off for almost a year now. I did not realize that you might need more pressure or things change...until I talk to Rob's dad and he said that he had gone back for another sleep study and they found out he needed his pressure changed. Again what did I do...I procrastinated.

During a sleep study you don't sleep so I don't know why they call it "a sleep study". A nurse comes and wakes you up constantly (and I think he likes it too), they come in and adjust the pressure, adjust the mask...alot because mine falls off. Well, when I was done the guy (who had done my last one too) said well, you don't sleep alot you move around constantly. Thank you, but I knew that. Anyways he said to see my doctor after they reviewed my tape they would send it to him in about a week. What did I do...I put it off. A couple of weeks later I finally made an apt with the ENT.

While I was there, the doctor, checked the ear the bug had decided to make a home one night in, and said they was still some dried blood there but it was healing and the scratches were gone. Thank you I didn't need to be reminded about that nasty bug (I am now sleeping with ear plugs, thank you very much).

We got down to the sleep study and she said that they kept upping my pressure and that it did not help me. She said they finally added in and out air pressue to my mask and I slept much better, that she was changing my machine. Great, like always I cannot do things in the normal way. So the nurse is coming today to give my new machine and I will let you know if I sleep.

Grand Girls are Gone...Gone I Tell You

2011-07-21T14:52:00.000-07:00

Well, the grand girls are gone. They are off to the unknown, uncharted, dark and cold world. Now why would their mother and father do that to them. Don't they know that any world without their grandma Gray "The best Grandma in the whole world", is a cruel...cruel...world?
And for all of you who are curious, yes I balled my eyes out, I wailed and there was even some gnashing of teeth. I am so sad.

My husband has informed me (he was only trying to get me to stop wailing) that we can go visit them, and it is not like we will never see them again so he said. He is wrong...wrong...wrong, does he know where we live. I am clear on the other side of the planet. A grandmother needs to be right next door to her grandchildren...or at least an hours drive. She needs to be there in case of emergencies (to protect them from beatings), she is there to defend them from all the wrong in the world, and definitely from their parents...when need be.

She is also there to color with, cook, make play dough, swim in the kiddie pools, and teach them how to get on their parents last nerve. Now the whole learning process is in stalemate, and don't think I haven't forgotten about the other grand children. Rob says, "oh you still have two grand kids here...pish posh, and yes I do believe it is some consolation, but I want all of them...I must have failed somewhere as a parent, either that or my power of manipulation is fading.

UGH! A Bug In My Ear

2011-07-05T23:35:00.000-07:00

Okay this is gross, so leave the room if you have a tender ear, lol. This morning at 3:00 I felt a tickle on my ear and thought it was my hair so I batted it down to my ear. Then I felt a bug (I tired not to think about what kind of bug) go inside my ear. I got up immediately and started for the bathroom. And yes I was in panick mode. I looked in my ear, I patted it down in the sink (like that was going to do anything) and I prayed...please God...please God. You see I have this phobia ever since I watched a medical show where a woman got a cockroach in her ear, and felt like she was going mad, and the doctors could not see anything. Then it started moving in my ear again, nope this is not fluid this was a bug and it decided if it was going to miserable stuck in my ear it was going to make me miserable and I decided if it was going to make me miserable was going to make my husband miserable. I have rights by marriage, just check the contract.

He of course thought I was just being over dramatic. He looked in my ear with a flashlight (like he was going to see anything) and said nope I don't see anything and went back to bed. I did my best impression of pissed off, putting my hands on my hips for effect and told him it is a bug and I was gong to the emergency room with him or without him. The bug was moving like crazy I guess it didn't like all that yelling. I pulled on some clothes and told myself, "It will be okay Dee, just try and not think about it...yeah right...remember the phobia? Rob got dressed (and not as quickly I am sure as if it would have been him who had a bug stuck in his ear).

After forever, and the bug moving rapidly and hurting my poor ear, like you would never believe, so painful, I focused on God and thought about anything but that stupid bug in my ear. The doctor looked in it and said yep its a bug it's a cockroach and a big one...okay what is wrong with him? I told him, "Look I don't need to know how big it is or what it is, just get it out. He smiled and then he said first give her some adavan...wonder why he said that? Then they put drops in to numb my ear and kill the bug, the bug stopped moving immediately and finally I could relax and stop freaking out. He tried to get it out but it was coming out in pieces. He finally gave up and called the ENT and I went up there (where they obviously have better equipment). It was out right away and the doctor said hey don't I know you? I said yes, you took out the lump in neck. He said oh yeah, how are you doing. I said fine except for the bug, he laughed, and said yep it was a big one...what is wrong with these doctors, why can't they understand, I DON'T WANT TO KNOW WHAT KIND OF BUG OR HOW BIG IT IS?

Needless to say, I have drops for my ear, it is really sore, and inflamed, and I have been the brunt of everyones jokes today, I don't care, and tonight I am wearing ear plugs...and every night from now on. I went back to bed called work and told them I would not be in till later, and went to sleep...with ear pugs.

Grand Girls are so....GRAND!

2011-06-22T22:53:00.000-07:00

I got off early today and decided to pick up the girls and spend some time with them. Christina is packing out today and I just wanted to be with the grand girls and give her a little break. We did stickers, and cereal necklaces (I think we ate more than we stringed), then we made chocolate chip cookies. Then they washed my dishes (they love to wash dishes trust me that will change) What a wonderful day, every time I think about them leaving I get teary eyed, it is just not fair, once again my girls are deserting me and I will be surrounded with men...UGH!

It was such a wonderful time, and on the way home we just talked, because Faith just loves to talk, but I let her and I answered all of them. It was funny but even Kady had to get in a few words. I told them how I had told everyone at my work I just didn't want to work today because I just had to spend time with my grand girls and they were more important than working so I was leaving for the rest of the day. Faith asked me, "Did you quit grandma?" I told her no, I just took the rest of the day off. Then I told her how much I love her and her sisters and how special they were. I told them they were such good cookers, and dishwashers and so talented at art work, and how lucky I was to have such special grand daughters, I mean I was really pouring it on (because I love them and want them to feel special), and I told her I always brag to everyone about how special they all were to me. Then Faith melted my heart and said, "Grandma what you just said made me feel so good inside, and I do feel special now".

Imagine that, my heart was full and for the first time I realized my job here on earth is done, and if God took me home my life would be complete...I made my grandchildren feel special. It don't get better than that.

Marking my Territory

2011-06-21T01:33:00.000-07:00

When Rob and I worked in the same place, he would never kiss me goodbye, I was just down the hall. Now, I think I like working in another building because I get goodbye kisses, and I have to say it really rocks. I don't understand the difference but I am a firm believer in not to questioning "why" just be glad that it is kisses galore. Kisses in the morning and kisses at lunch. Anyways, one day we walking after lunch and I kissed him goodbye and told him to have a nice afternoon, and he smiled at me and said you did it again. I just said, "what" with that innocent look on my face. He said you like marking your territory don't you? I thought about it for a second and then I watched him wipe the lip gloss that I had just planted on his lips off with the back on his hand. He said, "you do that on purpose, don't think I don't know it". I grinned of course...he is right, but at least it was a lovely shade of pink, as my grand daughter Faith says, "pink matches with everything", even my husband. So my secret is out...I have been marking my territory...and loving every minute of it.

Happy Fathers to All the Fathers

2011-06-19T00:31:00.000-07:00

My father is no longer here, and yes Father's Day is diffucult for me. I can no longer talk to him and tell him about stupid things that I know only he would care to listen about. I wish he were here, and it still hurts not to be able to go out and shop for him. I would take special care in picking out something I knew he would like, even though he had everything in the world. He did not need big fancy gifts, and he always pretended he loved what I picked.

The things I did with my dad:

My father taught me how to laugh at life...even when I felt like crying.
He always had a wonderful sense of humor.
He taught me how to play baseball, water ski, fish, clam dig, grunion hunt, catch fly flies, fart, blench (really loud) which mom thought was disgusting.
He taught me how to swim (cuz mom couldn't), body surf, dive, dance on his feet, drive stick shift (okay maybe that one didn't go really well and mom had to take over), how to change a tire, how to check my oil, how to play tennis (I loved that one).
He taught me how to love volleyball, badminton, bowling (oh how he loved to bowl).
I flew my first kite with him, climbed my first a tree, hop my first fence. He gave me my first skateboard, my first bike, my first car.
He was good at helping me torment my brothers, love my mom, and give people a pink bellies (to my brothers)
He taught how to fight like a boy, play football, and plant a garden.
Best of all:
He made me feel safe in the world. Made the monsters get out from under my bed. He taught me how to stand up for what I believe is right. In his eyes I could do no wrong, and I knew he was my biggest fan. He did not get to see me graduate from college (I wish he could of seen my diploma), but he supported me no matter what. He loved me enough to discipline me (even when that was such an ordeal). He even let me hate him in my teen years. He was my dad and nobody can ever take his place. Happy Fathers Day...till we meet in heaven I love you.

Proud to be Called "Mom"

2011-06-12T22:56:00.000-07:00

I am so proud say that my son, Garrett is now a Civil Engineer. I am so proud of him, not because he is a civil engineer, but because he worked so very hard to get it and without anyones help. He knew what he wanted to accomplished and he went after it. I really don't think he knows just how wonderful he is. He has overcome so much in life, and he is a fighter. I hope he realizes that he can accomplish anything in life, and with God all things are possible. We were all praying for him. I love you Garrett and I just love being your mom, you are my special angel sent from God above.

2011-06-08T20:16:00.000-07:00

Poor Nanny was in the hospital yesterday. She is home though, and I know it is only because I prayed for her...okay maybe because everyone prayed for. Maybe I just have low self esteem...okay I have a big ego or like Rob likes to say a (big head). As a matter a fact I believe my mom used to say she was surprised that my head fit through the door at all. Now see with all that wonderful praise it is no wonder I am such a confident and wonderful prayer. Oh yeah, but this little blog is not about me, it is about my Nanny, and oh how I love my Margaret...okay...okay...now just stop it, I know...you all love her too, but I love her so much more and I am so happy you are feeling better. It is okay Margaret ;) I won't tell everyone who your favorite in-law is, I won't tell them who your most favorite person in the whole wide world is (wink, wink, nod, nod) but I bet her name starts with the letter Dee, oh my could it be me? I'll never tell that would just crush all people with already low self esteem, and I will work hard on my low self-esteem....don't say it mom....or Rob. I love you Nanny and guess what so does my Jesus.

2011-06-04T22:15:00.000-07:00

2011-06-04T22:10:00.000-07:00

More of the Girls

2011-06-04T22:02:00.001-07:00

Kady really enjoyed the playdough

Look at that beautiful smile

"The Grand Girls"

2011-06-04T21:55:00.000-07:00

Grandpa and Kady doing Itsy Bitsy Spider over and over and over again.

Grandpa's really getting into it

Kady in the morning

See is playing with her letters.

A Time of Darkness

2011-06-04T21:35:00.000-07:00

This has been a hard week. With Justin going home to be with the Lord it has been truly heartbreaking. My heart bleeds for my brother, and I wish I had words or comfort to offer him, but I don't, and I don't really think anything I could say would be a comfort to him. So, instead I have to leave him in Gods hands...they are good hands and I pray for him everyday anyways, but now I pray for encouragement and strenght. If I was in the same situation, I know I would be going a little crazy. Randy was such a wonderful father to Justin.

All I want to do is take away his pain, but I can't, I don't understand why God has put him through this trial life, but then we may never know. I just wish I was there to comfort him, but I know that God is there with him and he is holding his head up right now and carrying him. Please pray for my brother. I love you Randy.

Memorial Day Fun

2011-05-29T22:54:00.001-07:00

My Little Fairies

2010-12-27T20:45:00.000-08:00

A Little Fairy Dust Goes A Long Way

2010-12-27T20:02:00.000-08:00

I am sure that Briana is glad to be back home (except for the snow), and I am glad that things are back to normal, but every now and then if I am still and listen closely, I can hear the little pitter patter of little feet of Christmas past.....Jackson, Kaya, Faith, Marianne, and Kady Bug. Even though on Christmas I was so busy cooking and getting a proper meal together for my family, my heart was full, overflowing, a fountain of joy bubbling over as I listen to all the laughter.

I had my "Bud" with me in the Kitchen (Garrett) helping prepare everything, and when it was close to eating time it was just like it used to be when they were all little. I had Briana and Christina come in like they used to when they were little and talked story with me while I cooked. When I sounded the, "Get everything ready it is almost time to eat", they all rallied together, getting tables pushed together, seats ready for the babies, plates, napkins, utensils, and everything else that would make their mom proud. I love my family I love everything about each of them, and then when it was time to eat, we gave thanks, and my heart was moved. I was moved because I am truly blessed in every way I wish they could see in my heart the joy they give me. When we were all done, Briana and Garrett cleaned up....everything and again I felt special.

But the best present was the photo they took, and yes as Briana put it, "It is not prefect", but we are not prefect are we? It was prefect for me and in my eyes, it was the prefect gift. And every time I look at it I will re-live those memories again, and it will be my safe place to go when the world in closing in. I will put it on my desk at work I will smile every time I look at it, because my family makes me so proud. I don't know what I did to deserve such a special bunch, but it is like my fairy dust.....one sprinkle goes a long way, and when people get us down, just sprinkle a little behind the ears and remember our special day. I love you all very much.

We are Running to the Park more to come

2010-12-24T12:16:00.000-08:00

The New Pirate ship for the New Disney movie.

My Fav's

2010-12-24T12:07:00.000-08:00

Kaya and Grandpa

Kaya after swimming

A family affair

2010-12-22T23:56:00.000-08:00

More Bellows

2010-12-22T23:49:00.000-08:00

James having a snack

Chuck and Christina

Chuck

Faith

2010-12-22T23:44:00.000-08:00

Marianne on the boggie board
Chuck and Faith

Christina and Kady

Bellows Beach

2010-12-22T23:28:00.000-08:00

Garrett and Faithie

Jackson and Daddy

Briana and Kaya.

We had a blast today. Now everyone don't be haters when you see how beautiful a day it was. I know some of you are in cold....cold weather, and mom you guys have had a lot of rain, we have too, but God decided to let it up so our family could gather and have some fun at our favorite spot....Bellows. Chris we can't wait till you can be here to join us. It just wasn't the same without you, so I made a few sand castles in your honor. I love you son. Stay safe. Here you go pictures galore.

Today Was Completely Wild

2010-12-21T00:53:00.000-08:00

Everything about today was completely wild. There were dogs barking (Jackson) and kitties meowing (Kaya) I heard a few bears (Garrett) and I heard a few chickens cackling (Briana laughing). Like I said it was a wild place.

Since Rob went in last night and got his stuff in for work he is completely enjoying himself. We went shopping all over came home and ate. I made fried rice with left over rice, like I used to when the kids were small minus the spam. Spam is just not good for anyone any more.

We all shopped till we dropped and everyone got something. Garrett has something planned for Christmas for all the adults.....that might be a little scary we will have to wait and see what he has planned for us.

All in all it was a great day.

What kind of Game is Called "Mexican Train".

2010-12-20T00:28:00.001-08:00

Well the kids are all here and it has been nothing but fun, except for my grumpy husband. I think it is because work is making it difficult for him take off and just relax. Well, trust me he is not relaxed. I have decided to be relaxed for him.

Today we made brownies and played Mexican Train....it is a domino's game at first we thought Garrett had made up the game (along with the rules) we asked him to show us the tin and when he did low and behold it said, "Mexican Train". We laughed so hard. Then we became leary of Garrett telling us the rules, because if you know Garrett at all, you know that....well....he cheats, where did he get that from? So you can understand if he is telling us the rules, they rules will probably be in his favor.

Well, at the end I was thinking maybe him and Briana made up the rules together, because I did not win one hand......I think it was rigged. Another day, another Mexican train to beat.

Give Thanks In Everything

2010-12-14T09:42:00.000-08:00

I was reading Daily Bread this morning and it had something in there that basically said, "STOP GRUMBLING". We should thank God for all the daily blessings he has gives us instead of always grumbling about what we don't have. It is like a slap in God's face when we grumble. Much like the Israelites in the dessert complaining about the manna, they had all the food they needed and still they complained.

I am so blessed and so many times over then most people. Christmas for me is always going to be hard though, because dad is not here. If you could of seen my dad at Christmas time you would understand. He was like a big kid when it came to Christmas he loved everything about it. While my mom on the other hand (sorry mom) grumbled about it. She hated the tree mess, and the mess of the pkgs, and the mess in the kitchen (I guess there was alot of mess), but my dad loved all of it, and maybe because he didn't have to clean up after us all.

He made Christmas magical in my eyes. He would always pile us in the car when we were little and we would go see the Christmas lights. There was this place in California (close to Beverly Hills I think) it was all up hill, and the blocks would have themes and everyone would have tons of lights every where. We would ooh and ahh, it was magical, and my dad loved it. It didn't matter how old we got if we asked him to go see it, he would pile us in the care and we would go. I know my mom would never admit it, but I think even she enjoyed it (maybe because there was no mess for her to clean up).

At Christmas time my dad was always so happy, and even though we didn't have much when I was little he still had a way of making it magical. I remember the way his eyes would light up while he strung the Christmas tree lights for the first time, and his joy rubbed off on all of us kids.

The last Christmas I spent with my dad we all came home, even Briana was there. I knew it would be his last and I wanted it to be the most special Christmas. I believe in my heart it was, we made tons of Christmas cookies, we sung, we danced and we feasted. I think I even saw that old sparkle in his eyes, even though he was weak from chemo, he was truly happy. So when I get to missing him and I always do during this time, I just try and remember those moments I was blessed with and I get happy again, what is there to be sad about? He is in heaven having the best Christmas of his life.

I would like to think he is in heaven now looking down at all of us and he is proud that the tradition is still being played out and I hope the grand kids will feel the magic this year from me like I did with him. And I will tell them about their Grandpa Marsh and the legacy he has left here in my heart. I give thanks for family and guess what mom, now I will be cleaning up the mess......but it is all good. I wish you could be here with us I love you mom, thanks for all the great Christmas' past and my gosh for all the great cookies and food. Your the greatest chef I have ever known, and the most blessed.

A Hawaiian Christmas

2010-12-13T15:58:00.000-08:00

What is Christmas like in Hawaii? Well, we have dat white stuff, but we call it sand. We don't get cold and we never say, "It is freezing outside". As I look out my window at work all I see is blue, blue and more blue skies, and have you ever been to the beach during the winter that didn't freeze your toes off. Not here, all is warm, warm and warm. Now, sometimes you get a few showers but that is all. The best thing about Christmas in Hawaii is "Family".

This year I can't wait to watch the faces of the grandchildren as they experience "Hawaii" for the first time. They will get to discard their jackets and don their slippers. They will get to run in the sand instead of the snow. They will get to feel the same thing that I do when we are all together. There is plenty of laughter, hugs, kisses, tormenting (from Willie and Garrett), love, wrestling, and plenty of competition. Everyone talks loud in order to be heard.....to me loud is a blessing it mean my house is full, not just with people but with love.

I always laugh so hard I am crying. I can't wait to hug Briana and Kori you know what happens when your hugs get stored up, you get the tar squeezed out of you, and that is just what I plan to do. I can't wait to play the Christmas song game, and I especially cannot wait to dance with Jack and Kaya. I can't wait for them to see their cousins and play with them for the second time. God has blessed me so good this Christmas, but then he always does, my heart is full and my cup runneth over. I just can't wait for Christmas in Hawaii.

Too bad sooo sad

2010-12-09T16:44:00.001-08:00

Briana honey you are going down babeeh!!!! Yep the Christmas Music Game is mine this year, and guess what unlike you I don't even have to practice. I am the winner oh yeah, I am the winner.

Jam...Jam...Jam I love Jam

2010-12-04T18:36:00.000-08:00

The guava strawberry tree is blooming again, all over the place we can't pick them fast enough. So I made some jam today. Two cases full, and I will use them for presents again, like I did last year, they work out very well last year, people even gave me back their empty jars so I could fill it again.

Rob's back he wasn't too happy with me I left him at the air port for a little while (okay maybe 30 minutes). I knew he was coming I just thought it was at a different time, and I know I don't answer my phone (like my family loves to tell me). Pooh to all of you. Look he should be happy he got picked up. I could have forgotten all together so let us be happy for the little things.....like a good memory.

Briana and Garrett just be happy dad is back so when you come out you will get picked up and on time.

Help Me I've Fallen and Can't Get Up

2010-12-01T16:10:00.000-08:00

So last night I was determined to find my tree skirt. I have no idea where it is, after moving and skipping decorations last year, it is bugging me to no end where my oraments and skirt is....oh where oh where did my lovely tree skirt go......oh where oh where could it be.

Okay so let us skip back a little. My husband got a Christmas tree, a real one, super early this year. Why? He says, "They chop them all down at the same time". Sounded good me, is he right? Who knows, I believed him so we got it last week before Thanksgiving.

Rob is TDY this week in Oklahoma. So he was busy packing before he left and I didn't want to bother him with getting down the bins with Christmas things in them, but I really wanted to search for my skirt, so being the great wife I am. I told him not to bother......but really I....being my stubborn "Marsh" self that I am, I was thinking in my head (where he couldn't see thank goodness) that I would take care of it myself, because I am a strong independent woman who doesn' t need a man to do things for her.....yeah right.

Now we can skip ahead. Needless to say I set out last night while the boys were gone at school to show the men in the house just how capable I am....dang men, I am surrounded by them.....all the time. So I got the ladder (I am sure you are already getting the picture) and climbed up to the second floor landing....well, second floor if we made one, it is up where we keep out storage right now. I climbed all proud of myself and then started moving bins, things started teetering this way and that, which at first wasn't bad they didn' t have much in them.

It got tricky after that because I ran out of room to put things and the bins got heavier. A few times I almost called it quits, but decided I was a woman and I could do anything....even fall if need be, which I came close to a few times. The heavy bin, the one with the lights in it did fall, and all the way down, crashing down taking (sorry Briana) a picture frame with Briana and Kori's picture with it. It crashed to the ground....glass was everywhere. I like to do things right, if I am going to destroy things I am going to do it good.

It took a feat that you would not believe and almost falling myself to get the other bin down, but I did. I could have been upset but I think I was just glad I was alive and well. I was upset about the picture frame though. I fixed things up as best as I could like any woman would have done, and then blasted all Willie came home.

Willie scolded me something awful, then James came home, and he got his scolding in too. Then Rob called me and didn't want to be left out he scolded me too. They were not looking at it like I was, "I had accomplished a death defying feat without any assistance......from the dang men!!!!!

I still did not find my tree skirt (I don't think they care), Willie said, "Buy a new one". While I was frowning at him I remembered the commerical about the elderly woman falling and yelling, "Help me I have fallen and I can't get up". Yep that could of been me, nobody was home to help me if I had. Well, instead of dwelling on what could of happened I did like any good woman does, and I put up the Christmas tree lights up without any help and might I toot my own horn and say what a great job I did too. Tis the Season.

This to Shall Pass

2010-11-06T13:27:00.000-07:00

Well my eating right has certainly gone out the window, exercising too. No excuses it is a high stress week, and I have messed up my heal on my foot (I cracked it on my desk chair at work).

Okay so where do I start, first of all just pray for me for encouragement. I have been put upstairs with the Director and the executive for two weeks. I knew it would be stressful (I have had to do it before) and I don't like the executive, but I really had no choice. I went in with a good frame of mind, and prayed throughout the week, but when I got home everyday I fell apart totally mentally exhausted. I never realized how stress can just reek havoc on my body, I guess I usually don't pay attention.

No one up there smiles or laughs or has a good time. I now know why, but still it is very sad. You see, we work for a Colonel (A6 Director), and it is kind of like working for the president, because when he wants or needs something everyone jumps and runs around with there heads cut off trying to get him what he wants, including me. They are also not very organized up ther and they lose folders and things all the time. He is not a very nice person either, instead of being nice to everyone around him because they are helping him, he is "cold", and so the office staff has learned to be "cold" too. It is why the new secretary left and found another job.

So I have been the opposite, I have been friendly and cracked jokes and laughed out loud. I have entertained everyone who came through, and brought my candy up to make everyone happy. I have even gotten compliments about how friendly I am and how they don't mind coming up now because I make it pleasant. Everyone who comes in usually rushes by me (ignoring whoever sits in secretary seat).....so I have been yelling out hello, how are you and in the beginning of the week they were surprised, but now they smile at me and say hello first.

By the end of the week, the office staff was cracking jokes and laughing, and having a good time. That is the way it should be and it is how God wants me to be "Friendly". It has still been stressful working for the Director and Deputy, and I am glad the weekend is here and that next week we have a holiday. I can't wait to get back down to my desk and have the freedom I love. I would never apply for that job.

I also don't get to take cell phone calls up there and I miss talking to Briana everyday.....it really sucks. I love you pookie can't wait to hug you and squeeze you and pat your fury head.

2010-10-28T22:24:00.000-07:00

Admit it, you have all been impatiently waiting for my next post, and your lives are not complete without being able to read about my most interesting life......especially you Briana. I can't help it my life is just so full of exciting little adventures, but it is okay I won't tell anyone your secrets are safe with me.....all of them.

Well, lets see what exciting thing should I tell you about first? Oh yeah, I (get to) be upstairs to fill in for the secretary because she took another job. Okay this is bad news, it is very cold upstairs and I don't mean weather......brr! It is so bad that all of us secretaries that work for the Division Chiefs have been fighting over who gets to go next. The really funny thing is one of the Admin Asst. is a guy and he was just up there. He wanted to apply for the job.....that was before he was up there. Poor thing he couldn't wait to get back to his old job.

So what shall I do......I have decided to be so nice that I drip it all over the place. I though about screwing things up so bad that they would never ask me back but I am too nice (just like I did when Rob went TDY and mowed the grass) I never had to mow again I wasn't allowed. Pray for me.

The Entertainment Center

2010-10-25T13:49:00.001-07:00

The entertainment center is almost done, Rob still is going to make some doors on part of it. I am so proud of him, it looks so much better than anything I could have bought. He is so skilled at wood working. I just tell him what I want and he is able to do it.

Still making improvements around the house. I dragged my husband all over yesterday looking for some wicker chests to go up on my closet in the bedroom for storage. We had to stop at three Ross' before I found matches, and then he had to go back and get an extra one that I decided at last I must have. "What a man".......he loves me.

I got a couple of baskets to go in the den in the entertainment center too. The den is finally starting to get uncluttered. We bought a washer and dryer that we could stack so we could move the freezer into the laundry room, and it turned out so good. Now that nasty looking freezer is out of my den. We still have to do some more uncluttering, but we are getting there. James love the entertainment center cuz the TV sets up higher and he can play his new baseball XBOX game on it. I think BeBe (the cat) likes the new den too.

More pics

2010-10-24T14:06:00.000-07:00

Pictures Around the House

2010-10-24T13:41:00.000-07:00

How about those curtains?

If you notice all the blaid lines up.

2010-10-24T13:35:00.000-07:00

Pictures of My Painting Project

2010-10-24T13:22:00.000-07:00

Now the boys say they don't see the difference, but I do, the difference is now clean and not dirty. I white washed my brick and I am so much happier with it, Rob liked it better before, but I was sick of looking at the dingy yellowish dirt in the motar.

Doing the Funk

2010-10-24T12:49:00.000-07:00

Mom told me I haven't been writing on here lately, so she says I must be in a FUNK! I don't really know if you can call it that, but I definitely haven't felt like writing. I do get in this funk mood now and then in my life. What does it mean?

No, I am not depressed, if I were I would be writing non-stop. The mood as I like to call it, my husband knows it well is my "I am at the beach" mood. What does that mean? I want everyone to just leave me alone.....and I crave quiet. When I get in these moods I picture myself running away from home and becoming a hermit somewhere cut off from the world. No I would never really do it. It is just a feeling I get from time to time.

It happens maybe every 3 to 4 years. I just close down for a while. God and I talk a lot and maybe it is me taking some time to get closer to him. I don't know, but yes mom I am in a funk. It will pass it always does.

Hey, and thanks for noticing, just means that you really know me and that makes me happy. My mom loves me so much she knows my moods. Nobody else has asked except you. I love you Mom. This is funk goddess saying, "over and out peoples".

Back on Track

2010-09-28T18:22:00.001-07:00

I need to get back on track. I walked yesterday, but not as far as I usually go. At least I did it. I am going to go again today. I think I like walking better at home, there is a hill you come to do and it sometimes it really kicks your butt, but after you reach the top I feel like "Rocky" all over again because I made it. You feel elated that you were able to make it to the top without passing out or losing all of you air.

I remember when the kids were little back when it was Briana and Garrett, I used to put them in a red wagon. Briana would hold on to her little brother for dear life (poor Garrett) and we would go all over the place, just the three of us. Then later when it was all six of us it got a little more difficult but I would bring plastic bags on our walk and let them collect whatever they wanted and then we would come home and make collages with the stuff they collected. Walks remind me of family. I just wish I had the energy I had then now. Nothing clears the mind better than a nice walk. I like to talk to God when I walk and just listen to what he has to say to me.

Weekend.....Over!!

2010-09-27T16:46:00.000-07:00

I went and lavished myself with a pedicure and some nails, just because I felt like it. I miss doing girls day out with the girls now that they have their own families and Bri is so far away we don't get to have it anymore. So enjoy it now girls while the kids are young. I have say I always enjoyed every minute of it. Me and my girls.

Rob stayed home from work to finish my entertainment center (yes baby). Our den is just a short way from being done now. I have one more set of curtains to make and all the windows will be done. They match so well, I will take pictures when I am done so you can all see.

Next week I am so excited I will pick the girls up on Friday and have them until Sunday. I have so many fun things planned, I have to say it really pays off being an ex preschool teacher. Christina will have a much need break, but for me it will be heaven. I love being a Grandma, maybe even more than being a mom.....it comes very close.

Walking Again

2010-09-21T18:04:00.001-07:00

Okay so I am walking again, but it is really hard, not quite recovered so I only got to do 45 minutes yesterday. Everyone can be proud of me I did not gain any weight while I was home. This week has been a struggle so far, why? Well, not because of the food, but it is so hard to put that time aside to exercise, last night I almost talked myself out of it, and finally told myself, you know what Dee....you deserve to take some time and exercise.

I told the boys it was leftover night and I came home and had my favorite, an egg sandwich with mustard....yum. I had some fresh pineapple and I even had a skinny cow afterwards. It was great.

Things Accomplished

2010-09-18T13:13:00.000-07:00

This week has been great. There have been so many things around the house that I have wanted to get accomplished. Usually when the weekend comes something always comes around and needs to be done, and then I refused to work on Sunday because I need to get things ready for your work week again.

Finally....with this time off I focused on one thing at a time on my "really needs to get done list" that has kept me from feeling good about the house. Usually on the weekends things need to be cleaned so everything else goes to the way side. Being I able to cross things off feels great. Of course in the mist of everything I had to listen to my nagging husband (love you babe) and him telling me I shouldn't be doing this or that, or he was going to tell my doctor what I was doing.....whatever! If I didn't feel good enough to do something I wouldn't be doing it, and James helped me with the ladder and heavy stuff.

I could have gone back to work on Thursday but decided I deserved to take the rest of the week off and work on my "gotta get it done list". Nothing is more satisfying.

On Monday I had James dump off all the stuff on our closet on to the floor so I could go through it. It has been up there piled up since we moved in. I got rid of so much junk and when I was done I was able to see the ceiling again. I Love it! I went through boxes and boxes of junk and I didn't look back this went and this went, ladies most of it was my husband's junk and I do say junk, except for a brand new pair of Asics running shoes (did I say brand new). When I showed them to him, he had the gall to say oh where did those come from. Yep that's my husband.

On Tuesday, I painted the ceiling in our room (the one my husband left since we moved in) with brown paint on it, I would have patched it up months ago, but I had no idea that he had brown paint on my white ceiling until I moved the boxes and could now see it. Then I went over the trim of white ceiling vs brown (well it is really sand color) and made it perfect until it wouldn't bother me anymore (yes, I have a problem). When my husband paints he just paints he doesn't care if it is a little bit crooked, and me it drives me crazy to see it that way so I have to take care of it.

On Wednesday I had a doctors appt. so I just painted some more especially after it had dried from the day before and it looked totally a different color, I then realized I had not shaken it up good enough which made the color different, and here we go again, so I fixed it.

On Thursday I went through all my clothes, in the closets, in the dressers......everything. I got rid of three bags of clothes (I had not done that since we moved in) there was a lot of get rid of (stuff I hadn't worn in a while). I have promised myself since I love clothes so much that from now on if I buy something new, something has to go in place of it and that should solve the no room for anything.

Yesterday I worked on my curtains (still not done) touched up paint all around the house, you could tell I did because it is all over the floor, some was on my foot, don't worry it wipes up off the wood flooring (thank goodness). When Rob got home I told him I needed to go to Lowe's and get some more paint for our room, for the doors (we ran out) and I want to have some in case I ever need it. I also needed some round clips for my curtains too. We went out to eat after Lowe's and had a nice meal together (I let rob go to Outback, "I hate steak") and came home and relaxed. He thanked me because he knows I hate to eat there.....I sacrifice so much, hehehe.

This weekend I will have to give up my night owlishness as Rob puts it. Rob makes the owl noise every night because I stay up all night reading (because I can), but next week I will have to get back in the groove of work YUCK!

So I am proud I got some things done the rest of the weekend is relaxing, exercising again, and enjoying my last bit of freedom. I feel great still a little sore, but I have accomplished so much it feels good. I am still 10lbs lighter (did not gain any even though I couldn't exercise), but this week I will have to get back to exercising again.

Released

2010-09-14T23:09:00.001-07:00

Well I had my doctors appt today, and he said I could S-l-O-W-L-Y! He also said that I have to come back in 6 weeks because like before I have water that hasn't drained from the wound yet. So I will of course have to go back and make sure it has gone away. We all know the real reason...the doctors are all infatuated with me and they just love looking into my beautiful eyes.
I will have to make sure Rob goes in with me next time, lol.

I can either take the rest of the week off, or go back on Thursday. I am really thinking about taking the whole week. I have been able to get some things I have needed to get done. My husband of course comes home and yells at me, I am suppose to be resting.

More Books to Last me the Week

2010-09-12T18:43:00.000-07:00

Rob told me Tennessee was playing football at 2:00 yesterday so he said if I wanted to do anything I had to get it done early. He smiled at me and told me we could do whatever I want, with a devilish grin. So I made him take me to the material store because as you all know I flubbed my curtain making project in the den by cutting my plaid material without thinking about it. So my plan was to buy some solid material and used it at the top.

So we got there and Rob was off, he got on his white horse (my knight in shinning armor) and search the whole store. I just went to the solid material, and as I was sitting there, he brought over a whole bolt of the same fabric I had messed up and said, "Well, here it is". What a man, and there was plenty of it. He told me I could buy as much as I wanted he just wanted me to be happy (I was). Then he took me to the book store (the icing on the cake).

It wasn't just that he took me there, he waited patiently while I shuffled through all the books, I got a couple of my favorite (paranormal romances, and a few mysteries). He just waited and when I told him I was done, he said, "Are you sure I don't mind waiting you take as long as you want". So I did....like I said, what a man I have.

I am feeling much better...still sore and still walking slow but I was able to cook last night too, so everything is good here in Hawaii.

More pictures

2010-09-12T18:35:00.000-07:00

My Entertainment Center

2010-09-12T18:28:00.000-07:00

I know you are all looking at the shelves but look how loose Rob's pants are.

Rob hard at work.

The entertainment center is taking shape

As promised pictures....My entertainment center under construction.

Days Off

2010-09-10T02:50:00.000-07:00

It has felt really good to wake up when we want and do whatever we want whenever we want. Rob and I have really enjoyed our time off. It has been so relaxing for him and I. I love that whenever he takes time off (he's always been able to do this) he just focuses on our time. He doesn't worry about what is waiting for him at work. He just enjoys his time with me or the kids.

He is still working on the entertainment center (pictures to come) it is really good. He is so talented (I would say he doesn't realize it but he knows it). I love that about him, I love that he can look at something and say, "I can make that". He is such a talented wood maker.

Still Recovering

2010-09-08T18:30:00.001-07:00

Sorry everyone, I haven't felt much like writing, I am still recovering and my pain level is still there, but no worries it does get better every day. Sleeping is the hardest part right now and it is only because I am a side sleeper and I hate sleeping on my back.

Rob has been working really hard, cooking, cleaning and doing laundry. We went and got lumber yesterday because I knew he was probably bored babysitting me and why not put him to good use. Yes....my entertainment center is finally getting built and so far it is looking so good. We had shopped and shopped weeks ago and I did not find anything that would satisfy me, so I finally told him, I didn't care he was just going to have to make it me one. I knew what I wanted and he is doing such a great job.

Don't tell, but today I did clean up a bit, now I am really tired, but I just couldn't stand sitting here looking at all the stuff that needs cleaning. As soon as the entertainment center is finished, and the rest of the curtains I am sewing we will be moving on to James' room, which will leave him homeless for a while, but we will be doing flooring new bed set, curtains, painting, etc.

Well my peoples that is all for now keep it real.

Happy Birthday Garrett

2010-09-04T13:12:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday Garrett.....Your Moma loves you.....You are my sunshine!!!!

Another Day....Another Surgery

2010-09-01T22:15:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is Surgery Day I will have to be there at 5:45 and then like usually I will wait and wait and wait until there are ready for me. I am going to get my hernia fixed, I have put it off for this long because I just thought I would do when I felt like I could. So many surgeries and who wants one more. Now I am strong enough to get it fixed and move on. Then maybe I can have a normal life for awhile. Oh well.....wish me luck.

Rob's Home

2010-08-28T13:11:00.000-07:00

Rob came home yesterday, he had a wonderful trip and lots of things to tell me about. He loved hiking he always does when he goes to Alaska. I am sure he will have lots of pictures for me to see. Of course I had to hear too bad you decided not to come...yeah...yeah.

I got off early so I could pick him up, life is good when you can get off work early!!!

It is really nice to have my alarm clock back now I won't be late for work.

LATE

2010-08-26T16:54:00.000-07:00

This morning I was I opened my eyes and noticed how bright it was. Instantly I jumped out of bed and ran to the clock (there is not any light when I get up). For some reason my alarm clock did not sound, it has worked all week except today. Usually Rob is my alarm clock he nudges me every morning and I know it is time to get up, but I usually wake up in a light sleep even before that, but not today I was out cold.

I was out cold till the light came streaming in my room to tell me, "GET UP ALREADY". Then I rushed around trying to get ready, my friend IBS was in full bloom, so I told it to wait I did not have to time for it today I told it I would spend time with it later.

I rushed....rushed...rushed, until I finally decided well there is nothing I can do about it. I called my boss for the week (My real boss is gone for a week) and told him, I would be in later. Then I took my time getting ready. In the end I got there, no one even knew I was late or cared. Maybe God just decided I needed a little more sleep. My alarm clock (Rob) better get home soon or I am hosed, lol.

Rob's In Alaska

2010-08-25T16:51:00.000-07:00

Rob is in Alaska TDY (temporary duty assignment). He wanted me to go, but I passed up an opportunity, wanted to save my leave and it would be nice to be alone....eat what I want.....sleep when I want.....be bored when I want. The only problem is I AM NOT ALONE.

Last night I got home early from work (I usually get home late because I have to wait on Rob), I left at exactly 4:00 and got home a little before 5:00 (traffic don't you know). I walked in my house and sighed heavly.....Alone.....boys were are work.....so I thought. I got my exercise clothes on and put in a circuit CD got my weights and started working out.

A little while later, James enters with his long time friend Onagie, and I am not alone any more. I was not done so I threw him my most dirty of all looks and he said, "Oh your working out and headed back out the door". When I was done they came in and started talking and talking and talking.....it is what young boys do.

Then Willie called James to come pick him up from work, I gave them money to eat.....I was not cooking, and went to my room where I could be alone, but I got hungry and had to come out and brave the wild terrain. They brought home their spoils of fast food, and I made me something healthier I gave them all dirty looks, I thought if I willed it they would magically disappear, but I found out that only happens in story books. They did decide on a movie so I would get my alone time, but wait alas that fell through. James played his guitar and showed me a song or two or three, and Onagie talked my ear off. Willie stayed in his room.

I gave up and went in my room after I pretended to be interested in all of their conversations (Sorry boys). I read a few magazines, cleaned up a little and then got ready for my shower. Low and behold Rob calls....and of course I am naked (sorry for the picture people). At that same moment Willie banged on my door and wanted to hold a conversation through the door, so I yelled at everyone (bad me). I asked Rob why he was calling so late when I should have been happy that he just called me at all, and I yelled at Willie to leave me alone I was naked I would talk to him later.

Later on, after guilt set in and I thought about my actions. All I wanted was to be left alone, but the funny thing is I should be happy that they all love me and want to spend time with me, and they think about me. Who else has such wonderful children, James sings me songs, Willie tells me funny stories, and their friends let me cook for them. I apologized to Willie this morning told him I was an old cranky old woman, and that I was sorry. I will have to do the same when Rob calls tonight. I may not be alone but I am loved, what more could a girl ask for.

IBS SUCKS

2010-08-20T23:33:00.000-07:00

This morning it started I knew it was coming a bull fledged attack. Sometimes I get the mild ones, just little gas but they are okay, but once is a while I get the ones where I just can't function. I feel like such a baby so when I am at work I just don't tell anyone usually I go home, but today I was stubborn and I am paying for it now.

The cramps are incredible you feel like some has taken a vise and is twisting you intestines over and over again. Sometimes I throw up with them, I am trying to keep things down, the strange thing about is, you can't eat. I just can't eat and exercise is out of the question for today, Well, sorry everyone maybe tomorrow I will be passed it.

Giving Things Up Can Be Dangerous.....Really!!!

2010-08-19T17:27:00.000-07:00

Along with eating right and exercising, I have given up biting on my nails. This may sounds crazy but I love biting my nails and always have. When I am having a stressful day my hands go straight for my mouth. It is my comfort for me, I was a thumb sucker so I guess it was the next best thing after my dad put Tabasco sauce on my thumb to get me to stop sucking my thumb. My baboo did it too so maybe I got it from her.

I have to say it has caused many problems for me. First of all what do I do with all the extra movement I have now that I don't have it to calm myself down. When I was younger it help keep me from wiggling in class. Teachers hated that about me, I always had to be moving and either my leg was going a mile an hour or if I was standing I was constantly moving side to side, back and forth. If you have ever watched Briana you know she does the same thing....sorry Briana. Rob would laugh at us he said we made him sea sick, I would move one way back and forth and she would move the other way. All of my children do it. Rob doesn't so I know it comes from me, I just can't help it. I need to be moving.

So....not bitting my nails has caused many problems I did not have before. Like yesterday I went to scratch an itch on my arm and scratched off a mole....ouch it did not feel good and blood was gushing down my arm. I have scratches all over my hands, legs, and arms where I have accidentally scratched myself with my nails (and they aren't even really long yet). Nails are deadly people. I wonder if anyone ever killed themselves by scratching the tar out of themselves.....well, I tell you I might just be the first to find out.

Family Ties

2010-08-16T17:28:00.000-07:00

My daughter Briana (Pookie) and I were talking today, e-mailing then a phone call today. It is really nice to be able to do that, especially since we are so far away from each other. I miss her so bad some days it hurts, but I don't tell her. I don't want her to feel bad and I know she feels just as I do and she misses me to pieces.

During our conversation I came to a revelation (A good one). We (our family) is a family that stands together no matter what. The things I wanted to teach my kids the most for their lives I have accomplished. It has taken me a while to see it in all of them, but I do. It is so satisfying to be able to see it and watch them show it. They are important things to me and some of them were instilled in me by my parents:

Number one: To love the Lord with all your heart. My children do. I love to see them calling on God to help them in certain situations. I know it is silly but when they were small I used to make them stop (when they had lost something) and call on the Lord for help. I used to tell them God helps with everything even the small things in our lives, nothing is too little for God. I love to see them praying for each other. Like now when they are all praying for Chris. It warms my heart because I love the Lord with all my heart. I see them turning to him in all things like Rob and I have time and time again. I am a sinner yet God loves me, all of me the good, the bad and the ugly. I hope they teach their children the love of God and how to pray, because prayer is so important. My mom taught me how to pray and it was the best gift she ever gave me.

Number two: No matter what family sticks together, in everything. You don't have to like what they have done or may be doing at the moment but you do have to stand beside them and sometimes hold them up, kick butt for them, pick them up, dust them off, or just offer some good sound moral support or advice. One of my favorite bible verses is Speak less, listen often (which is sometimes hard for a Mom).

To watch them love each other with everything they have rocks my world and I have to say my kids truly love each other and their kids with all their hearts. It makes my heart full to see how fierce they love one another other.

One thing my darling daughter pointed out today is that we can be upset with each other and we can tell each other, we can get angry and yell and in the end still love each other. We don't play games with one another, pout or second guess what is on the each others mind. We say it like we see it, you always know what is on our minds. You don't have to like it, but at least you know how we are feel about things. I like that. I like that fact that each of my children are able to stand up for themselves, but most of all speak their minds. Rob used to get mad at me and he would say, "See what you did, they are talking back, but I would just smile as long as they weren't disrespectful, I saw it as equipping them for the big bad wolf (the world) and I wanted them to be able to blow the houses down (learn to stand up for themselves) when they needed to. I can truly say ALL the kids know how to do that, and I hope they teach their kids the same thing, to never be afraid to voice their opinions. My mom and dad taught me, it just took me a little longer to adopt it for myself.

My Garrett

2010-08-13T16:07:00.000-07:00

This one is for Garrett, Garrett I am so proud of you. I sometimes see the man you have become and it lights my heart up. You are so strong, and confident......okay and I will say it cocky (but your mom is too).

The little boy that I held so tightly at the hospital was such a fragile thing, and your birth was very quick, but because it was so quick the doctors said it was stressful for you. I was never so delighted than to share that day alone with you in the hospital. I told you my wishes, hopes and dreams for you, and told you about God and how he would always take care of you when I wasn't around. One starry night I held you up to stars and ask God to bless you and keep you safe.

There were times when we fought when you were growing up, but nothing touches my heart more then remembering you sitting in my lap, sucking you thumb and just being my Garrett. The little boy who used to dance with me and his sister took away all the bad in the world at the time and made me laugh when I didn't have much to laugh at.

You struggled for a while in school and I thought that putting you in early had been a mistake. I beat myself up about it and sometimes I cried because you tired so hard and it hurt you, but then you found your groove and you proved to everyone you could do anything as long as you worked hard enough. You inspired me.

I loved you and your sister so much you both were my the greatest joy. I never realized how much I was made to be a mom until you and Briana came along, then Christina, Christopher, James and Willie and I never realized how full-filing it could be. It is the best job in the world to have I hope you get to have it too someday (okay a daddy then). I wouldn't change a thing. If I did it would have changed you into a different person, and I love the man you are becoming.

Do you realize how special you are. When you love someone, you love them hard and strong, don't ever change that, because that is the way love should always be. The things I love about you the most is the way you always have time to listen. No matter what you are doing, you listen to the people around you, and not only that but you care about them too. You do nice things for people and yes when you don't have to do but because of your loyalty (which is never ending) you do it because you are their son, their grandson, their brother, or even their friend.

I love how intelligent you are and I love (I know I shouldn't but I do) how opinionated you are. I have always wanted my kids to speak their minds and not be afraid to do so, and man...can you do it. I love that you are never afraid (well you are but you do it anyways) to tackle anything. Like when you moved away from us and went to college and worked to pay your own way through all of it.

I love that you were there for my dad when he was dying (a lot of people couldn't of done that) but you did, because that is the type of person you are. I love that you write and boy can you write, from they many poems you have given me to the books. I love that you have that artistic side. I know I don't tell you all the time (now that you are a man) but I love you Garrett, and those who don't are crazy wack-a-doodles. From my little man to my big man......Know that your mommy will always love you no matter what. I am proud of you.

I love my MOMMY

2010-08-13T00:08:00.001-07:00

I just had to give a shout out to my mommy too! Just in case you got jealous cuz I love you too mom....whoop.....whoop.....drop it down low.......how low can you go.........MY MOM IS SO COOL!!!

Oh No not the In-Laws

2010-08-12T23:55:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to give a shout out to me in-laws!!! That would be the Margaret and Billy Wayne....So hey.....HO.....whoop.....whoop......love you guys.

I am so happy to have them apart of my life, there are so many people who don't get along with their In-laws. They fight and bicker and just hate them I mean really hate them......but not me. God has given the most supportive In-laws around. I love them like my parents they are warm and loving, and I aspire to be more like them in my Christian walk. They are always there for me in prayer.

When I was going through Chemo treatments there wasn't a week that went by when I didn't receive a card from them, and more than that they were praying for me, but not only that they had the whole church praying for me. When I was down they lifted me in up. If I were to ask them for a hand up they would give me four.

So here to you Margaret and Bill lets all raise our tea glasses high in the air and say here.....here to THE GREATEST IN-LAWS IN THE WORLD.

I have told them many times and I really mean it someday their mansion in heaven is going to enormous......I only hope they let me come live with them......mine will be much smaller. They do so much for the people around them they inspire me to be a better person. I love you both.

No no not Monday......please make it go away

2010-08-09T23:07:00.000-07:00

Yeap no denying it. It was Monday today, after a really relaxing weekend, well....I cleaned but I got to read too. I thought it was a good weekend. Rob and I walked everyday, and we walked today.

Today he stayed home, he went to a funeral of one of his mentors. I didn't......sorry I hate funerals. I went to work. I went to work, I packed my lunch and closed the door to the office at lunch time and pretended I wasn't there while I read a magazine. It was very nice and very quiet. The best thing about today......I did not have to wait on Rob to go home, because he had to pick me up, so he was there at exactly 4:00.

So all in all it was a pretty quiet today....Hooray for quiet days. Oh yeah and for all of you on the mainland Hawaii was beautiful today apsolutely breathtaking.

Today

2010-08-05T23:23:00.000-07:00

Today was good. Willie is sick he has been sick but too stubborn to go to the doctors. He will have to now he has a sore throat. I stayed home to try and get him an apt. but they did not have any so I went back to work. When I got there guess who had a phone call from Triplers human resources department. They said I was one of the top candidates for the job and needed some more information.....I told you. Now that I don't want it I will probably be picked.

When Rob and I got home we went for a walk. I felt so good because usually I have to beg Rob to walk with me, this time he asked me. Then after we got back to the house he said go on home, I am going to run and try and make it up the hill I never seem to be able to get passed without walking. When he came home he had.....what a man. I am already starting to feel better and making it longer and longer without wanting to quit.

Of course my son Garrett has helped inspire me with his books on tape.....thanks Garrett. My daughters have both inspired me too. A long time ago when they were little we were outside all the time and we walked and went to the park....being a mommy keeps you in shape.

Christina has never looked better, now that she isn't too skinny she is so beautiful and has a prefect shape from running after those girls, and Briana has worked hard to get back in pre- baby shape. My mother too, she is always working out and has her daily exercises. Now its your turn Garrett! Girls when I grow up I want to be just like you.

The interview is O V E R

2010-08-02T22:57:00.000-07:00

So I went over to my job interview at the hospital and sat and waited and waited, then four of them interviewed me all at once it kind of made you feel like you were ganged up on.

The Deputy Chief (who would be one of my bosses) proceeded to bash the Air Force (where I work). I love the Air Force. The Deputy (who likes himself....a lot) proceeded to ask me stupid questions, sorry but they were. Why were they stupid questions? They asked me what other jobs I have had and how long I have been in Hawaii, then one of the ladies was totally shocked, she oh you live here, I mean you call Hawaii home? All of those questions were on my resume (guess they don't read). I mean did they even bother to look at my resume at all.....I don't think so, and I am sure the Deputy didn't, and if his nose got any higher in the sky I am sure he would have took off.

I even got a lecture about how important his job was and how important they all were (him and the chief), they are so important that everyone wanted to meet with them all the time. Now I could have told him that I work for HQ PACAF and we have 3 Generals on staff, but I didn't I don't think he wanted to come down from his high horse and I didn't have the heart to watch a grown man cry.

Needless to say I wouldn't take the job even if they gave me a great deal more money. I never wanted to get away from somewhere so bad before and from the moment I arrived. I felt that way the whole time it was just terrible and nobody was friendly at all.

In the end they made me take a test.....yes I said test. I had to look over a memorandum and check it for errors, and after that one of the secretaries said, "Okay sometimes we are asked to right spur of the moment letters for the Chief so here is a blank paper write us a condolence letter the best as you can do". I looked at her like she was crazy and she said here are the names of the people the husband and his wife who died, now just write the best letter you can.

So I asked her, "I am sorry but who is this letter on behalf of, I can't write a letter unless I know who I am suppose to writing it on behalf of". She just stared at me and finally said, "oh that doesn't matter just do the best you can". Like I was a bother to her, I could not believe it, I was so shocked.

Then I got mad, I wrote, on behalf of the staff here at Tripler Army Medical Center we would like to send Mr. David Joesph our sincere condolences on the passing of his dear wife Elizbeth Joseph. I then finished it off like the professional I am. I am sorry but I couldn't wait to get out of there, I almost ran. Then I laughed all the way back to my job (which I love).

Headaches suck

2010-08-02T00:22:00.000-07:00

I had a bad migraine today. I didn't have it till after church so of course I am blaming my husband's sermon, hehehehe. He has been upset since yesterday one of his all time favorite people passed away. I feel really bad for him.

My head feels like somebody was bashing it today. I can't complain I don't get them like I used to, when they took some pieces out of my body it ended the monthly ones. When we went into Target today I smelled something in the auto section, and that is how it began. I will probably look at this tomorrow and say what the heck did I write.

I have been trying to figure out what I will wear tomorrow for my interview I don't thing it will matter, but I still want to look good. My office will be empty this week, my boss and the Major are both gone.

Okay peeps talk to tomorrow.

Movie with a Friend

2010-08-01T00:11:00.000-07:00

Went to the movies today with my friend Mo (Maureen McFerrin). Went went to see Eclipse, it was okay, stuck to the book pretty well, but I haven't liked the any of the books so there you go. Mo is a big Jacob fan, it makes me laugh, but it was fun anyways, cuz Mo always cracks me up.

You would have to meet her to appreciate her. She is a talker but then I like that about her, and she is really the nicest, caring person I have met. She talks too fast so you have to be quick in tongue in order to get a word or two in, but that is just another thing that I love about her. I have learned to shove a word in here and there, and sometimes it throws her off and she can't remember were she is, and it just cracks me up. She has an infectious laugh too. I love my Mo and we had a great girls day out.

Later in the evening I decided to take a walk and listened to my book on tape. I love that I have them. Garrett hooked me up when I went to California. It is so nice of him to do that, and now I have books to listen to when I am exercising and it really helps to make me want to get out there and do it.

Kids, you would be proud of your dad went running today I didn't have to nag him or nothing. and he is still dropping weight.

Job Interview Continues

2010-07-30T00:47:00.000-07:00

Okay I am going to let you all get a good laugh. Today I went on my interview for the Army Hospital I got there with about 5 minutes to spare sat down and tried not to be nervous. A lady finally came out and she said I am sorry but your interview was at 10:00. I said oh no, I wrote it down it was 1:00, I just kept telling her how sorry I was. She was trying to figure out what to do for me and I said, "Hey this is not your fault, If it is easier I will just come back another day.

So now I have to go back on Monday.....will I get the job.....I think not, but I am still going. I am going to follow through on this even if I am embarrassed. When I got back to the office I looked a the piece of paper and it said 1:00. So I don't know what happened. People remember if you are going for a secretary position and part of your job is keeping the man's calendar guess what......you probably won't get the job if you don't show up when your supposed to.

Guess it wasn't meant to be. The saga continues. Oh yeah and guess who's birthday it was today.....because children there were some of you who did forget, and believe me he never forgets yours he has everyone of you kids programed on his phone and he reminds me. You better suck it up and tell you daddy happy birthday.

Curtains

2010-07-28T00:21:00.000-07:00

Okay this is a short post as I promised the curtains I made. What do you think?

Lessons Learn

2010-07-26T23:46:00.000-07:00

Got a doctors appointment tomorrow I need to get my hernia fixed, I have put it off for almost a year now, and it is time. You could all understand though, I feel like the doctors office is my second home, except.....I DON'T WANT TO GO HOME ANYMORE!!! No mom I am not talking about you, I am talking about all the doctors who love to open me up.

Today was a pretty good day at work...why you ask? Because this is a payroll week, and almost everyone has turned in the time sheet (early for once) usually I have to hunt people down and give them the evil eye and tell them they better give me their time sheets or they are not getting paid. Now I have only had to do it once, someone didn't turn in their time sheet and I reminded them, but they still did not turn it in, so I let the payroll lady call him and tell him his time sheet did not get processed. He came over to tell me and I just smiled, he did too, and said, "I have learned my lesson Dee, never again". He hasn't been late since, hehehehe.

Sundays

2010-07-26T00:00:00.000-07:00

Today Rob and I went to Church with the boys. They haven't been going with us lately they are working now on Sundays. I worked on my curtains got them hung up and asked my husband, "What do think"? He looked at me and said well, I don't want to say. I said what tell me. For some reason I did not see what he was seeing.

Then he pointed out that each panel did not match. They are a blaid pattern, so I looked again, and he was right, when I cut them in half I forgot to keep their matches together. I was quite upset with myself and had to walk again away for a bit.

I tired again, and soon I had my first patch of curtains done, and that was it for the day. Now I have to decide whether I need to put a lining behind it or whether it will fine the way it is. Oh well short post see ya tomorrow. I will post the pictures of the curtains tomorrow.

Here We Go Again

2010-07-24T14:06:00.000-07:00

Well here we go again. We went to lunch together yesterday, Rob and I and left our truck to get tires on them.....they were pretty bad, but it took forever. Sorry, but when something is not interesting to me I zone off to another place. It took forever it.

When we got back we were late of course and I had a message waiting on my phone. It was for a job interview for a job at Tripler (Army Hospital) working as a secretary for the Chief or Staff and his deputy. Now I just turned down a promotion about a week or two ago because I heard terrible things about the man I would work for. I had just calmed my nervous stomach and I told you all how I hate to say NO! Well here we go again.

This is a promotion, but no one to talk to about the job or the person I will be working for, and hey I haven't even got it yet. So I am going to self analyze myself through this process and you can see how a really messed up my brain can work, lol.

S0 part of my brain says yea they want me....they really really want me (hehehe) and I get all giddy. More money, different work (little bit), more responsibility....a challenge....oh how I love a challenge. Another part of me says, "Stop it you haven't even got it yet, and if God wants it to happen it will happen". Next, the negative part of my mind says, "Nope...nope....nope don't want to do it". I am safe and secure where I am at. I would have to find my own way there, no more lunches with my husband. What if they don't like me"?

I make myself so crazy sometimes and I don't no why I do it, but it is apart of who I am. I have no idea what relative in the far past decided to pass this down to me, but it is mine and I wouldn't change a thing (except the nervous stomach).

Plus +:

More money (sorry it tops the list)
More ability to move up the ladder/more jobs in my career field
Have to pack my lunch (no fast food places around to eat out)
Walking up the hill and up the stairs (great exercise everyday)
New challenges

Minus -:

Riding in with my husband in the morning (tops the list)
I love the people I work for including my boss
I love working for the Air Force (very different for the Army)
I get 3 hours a week for PT time
I have a beautiful view from my office
Having to start all over

Summer is Here

2010-07-22T00:37:00.000-07:00

It is hot in Hawaii, so summer is here, now we don't have winter, but boy do we have summer. It has been a strange summer lots of rain, but yesterday when I was done from work I went on my "Rob doesn't want to leave, so I am going exercise while I wait" walks.

It was hot, but strange thing happen, as usual when it is just me and God. A beautiful wind picked up and I got kisses from God. Then I looked at the sky and what a picture God had painted for me.......it was wonderful. I thought for a second, "Is this great or what". I didn't even care I was walking. I walked and chatted with my bestest friend, "God". I felt like I was the only person in the world.

In the end I didn't even mind it was hot. After my walk ended (I was tuckered and Rob was no where to be found) I went to the library read a few magazines.....I hope nobody was down wind of me because if they were the smell was bad. Finally my hubby showed up I checked out a book, and he got three Cd's and we were done for the day.

Better Week

2010-07-21T00:34:00.000-07:00

Well yesterday Rob and I revisited the Chemo Ward......Oh how I hate that place. Sorry, I know I shouldn't but I hate that place, it makes for great anxiety seeing all those poor people struggling through their treatments, it is not a sad place people are as happy as they can be.

There is Jackie (one of the greatest nurses on earth) who still remembers you by name after 5 years, and some pretty great doctors, but I still hate that place. Forget about me though please pray for Trina. Rob and I brought her and her husband Mark some sandwiches, and of course I made a goodie bag full of wonderful things: Magazines (Him and Hers), candy (can't go wrong with red vines), cookies, crackers etc., and I bought 15 new bandanna's (for later when she looses her hair). I just want her to feel like people care about her.

We stayed and chatted a while and then we were on our way. My wonderful husband looked at me as we were leaving the hospital and said, "That was hard for you, huh"? I just shook my head, I had my sun glasses on so he didn't see the welled up tears in my eyes. Yes it was hard, but sometimes it is not about us. I thanked him for going with me and told him how much I loved him. He like he does just smiled at me you know the way he always does (like I am the most beautiful woman in the world).

Emotional Week

2010-07-17T00:54:00.000-07:00

This has been an emotional week. I really am drained. I guess this was my week to listen, because boy did I do a lot of it. After listening to the SMSgt Friend and his wife being diagnosed with cancer, another lady came in and said she was having martial problems.

Even though I have a degree in pyschology I have learned the finer art of listening from being a mother. It is amazing how God puts people in your path to comfort and help. With the job I have I get a lot of it sometimes. It seems my door was a revolving one this week. There are some weeks, were I get little done, and I feel like the week has been a total loss because I accomplished nothing, but then I re-evaluate. I see that although I did not get any "Work" done, I did get "God's Work" done.

It can be emotional exhausting though. I always feel good that I have help people, and I really believe that is my major calling in life, and what I was put here on earth to do. One of the problems is I kind of take on the emotion of it too. It is hard just to let go of it, so I just pray.

Job Offer

2010-07-17T00:47:00.000-07:00

Well I got a job offer this week, more money, but not the kind of work I am used to, and nobody....I mean nobody likes the guy who I would have been working for. So I turned it down. It wasn't a hard decision, especially with so many people telling me the guy is a jerk, and they said he would probably dump a lot of work on me (his work).

It was hard calling him up after he was giving me this great opportunity and saying, sorry I changed my mind. Why do I have so much trouble saying NO, and why do I feel so bad afterwards.

My husband as usual has all the right words and he seems to always know what to say. He said the bible says, "Let you yes be yes and your no be no". He also said would you want someone to work for you who didn't really want to be there? I know he is right and did feel better afterwards.

I am really going to have to figure this whole NO thingy though.

So Sad

2010-07-13T23:58:00.000-07:00

Today was very traumatic for me. One of the enlisted men has been going through a lot and because he knew that Rob and I have been through all the cancer stuff he has been talking a lot to me. His wife has a mass on her lungs and at first they said cancer, then they said no, and now it is yes again. Lymphoma Non Hodgkin's finally a diagnoses. We have been praying for her daily during our devotional time. Stage 4 he was devastated, he came in to talk to our boss...my boss, and asked me to be there to. His poor eyes welled up with tears and I could tell my boss didn't know what to do.

I did the only thing I could, I let God fill me up with the words of comfort, words of wisdom, I patted his shoulder rubbed his back over and over. As he tried to get the words out the overwhelming flood engulfed me I felt like I was taking back to the moment in time and I told him how he must feel, and as he broke up time and time again, I listened, I gave words of encouragement. I wanted to escape from it, but I know that God had put me there for a reason, but I struggled as I have never before.

As we left my bosses office I took him into an empty office and I asked him if it would be alright if I prayed with him, he said yes. When I was done I hugged him, I told him my best advice through all of it was God doesn't give you anything you cannot handle and it was what I held on to during my struggle. I also told him, to remember when his wife is mean to him, yelling and screaming it has nothing to do with him, and never to take it personally.

I had the greatest support during my fight, I screamed, I yelled, I cried like a baby and all through all of it, Rob, my kids, my mom, Rob's family, my friends.....everyone held me up. Most of all when I could not hear God, I still could feel him, but I would never wish it on anyone, and I would never want to go through that storm again. Please pray for Trina she has three little children too, that she home schools.

Beep.....Beep!!!

2010-07-13T00:35:00.000-07:00

My husband is under the impression that I have a sensor set up in the room that goes off every time he is naked. I told him it is just a woman's intuition. It makes me laugh though, it is really funny but he will go to the room to get his shower and no matter what I am doing, dishes....packing lunch....exercising, whatever it is I enter the room at the right moment.

The real truth is.....I am a witch......there is I said it, I even have two brooms at home, okay so I don't fly on them I sweep the floor. I bet there are times when all of you might have thought that there Dee is a witch, but I am not. I still say it is women's intuition and I am sticking to that.

Continued

2010-07-11T23:40:00.001-07:00

2010-07-11T23:35:00.001-07:00

Pictures From Today

2010-07-11T23:29:00.000-07:00

Amazing Mind of a Child

2010-07-11T18:07:00.001-07:00

Today Christina and Chuck came over for lunch. They have been in California for awhile, so it was good to spend time with them again, I have missed the girls so much and every time I see Kady she is bigger and talking more.

We were outside throwing a ball around and picking limes. Then we decided to blow some bubbles, which they all loved (even me). I turned to Rob and told him, I put the camera inside because it ran out of juice (the battery was running low). Faith was standing beside us and said the funniest thing. To see things in the eyes of a child. She turned to Rob and said, "I didn't know camera's take juice". We were all laughing, it was so funny.

Faith is a barterer, she reminds me of Willie sometimes, because he is the same way. When they were leaving I packed some fun fruits for them I always give them some snacks to take, and I also gave them some banana pudding. I bought them a easel to draw and paint on and she started her bartering.

"Grandma", she said, "Can we take the easel home"?

I said, "No but you can take the coloring books I bought",

Then she asked if she could take the crayons, and the sticker book. I told her she could take the crayons......hence the bartering began......I kinda of enjoy it, it always makes me laugh. She also tried to get the new sippy cups I bought for them too.

In the end she always smiles at me because I think she thinks she has pulled a fast one on Grandma, but little does she know that Grandma is just little smarter at bartering.......Let the games begin!